Monday, November 9, 2009

Fuck this thing called life - it's heavy!





Sometimes we all feel like we carry the world on our shoulders (or a boob)
but when you realize

that your life is heavy enough, you are getting a head start out on happiness.


The last 12 months I've carried a lot of past decisions on my shoulders, some financial, some family and friends. I keep looking for a place to set things down sometimes, but cant seem to find a suitable place. At the risk of my health, at the risk of losing my family and friends, I look for my happiness. I found some of it on a personal level with my girl friend. She has given me hope. Lately though, the more I try to make situations of the past right the more I feel like I am losing the rest of my life. I feel like if I am not in the constant flex of being in their moment of help and not finding solutions to my well being, I am losing them. I know that sounds ridiculous, but then again so has been the past 38 years. Life for me is more complicated than a Rubik's Cube.

Just needing to say this out loud not to be confused with mean eddie g rantings or what not. I am looking for a spiritual kick to the head, some enlightenment. I need a new view, new perspective and new people in life, not that I want to lose the old ones, but life is feeling pretty stale. Need to shake it up a little!!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Technology my New Drug of Choice

DAMN YOU Apple
DAMN YOU DROID
DAMN YOU all sleek devices.

Why must you make me lust after you so. Why do you taunt me with your your words your demon messengers like Boy Genius Report, Engadget Mobile, Tech Crunch, Gizmodo, even Phone Dog. I follow when I should percieve, I lust what I should not spend.

You have control over my mind, oh the blaspemy of it all. I rant at your shiny new goodness. The productivity and the wastefulness of a good time, my social outlet, my cry into space.

DAMN YOU!!!